Recently, I started working in a position which ended up being...my dream job. Amazing, right?
Also recently, I got knocked up.
So this week, I learned that to remain in my dream position, I would have to take a significant pay cut which is more than what was originally presented to me. Now let me tell you, this is a job where I walk in and can't help smiling. The people I work with are wonderful, I feel secure safe and supported. I feel like I am doing the work I was always meant to do.
So here's the deal. My husband and I have been busting our little behinds to "break free." we are SO close to owning a house. You know, one with a nursery with pistachio green paint and a little rocker and crib. One with a kitchen where I have space to make a pie unobstructed. We are also so close to buying me a new car. One where the defrost works in the winter and rain. One with a door handle on the driver's side. One that doesn't make that very scary clackety-clackety sound when I start it.
so
What am I to do?
Do I sacrifice my happiness and feeling of security for these things that we have both worked so hard for in this critical pre-baby time?
or
Do I sacrifice all our hard work and committment to this vision so that I can be happy in my work?
Am I a bad mother before my baby is even born if I choose my own happiness at this time?
Am I a bad wife?
Obviously, you're none of the above! As someone who hated my last job, I can't help but feel like you should be doing a job you love. I'm a firm believer that you have to take care of yourself before you can truly take care of others. But either way, I'm sure you'll figure it out! :)
ReplyDeleteoh and the anxiety begins
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